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Youapos;re gonna be a shining star,
And fancy cars, fancy car-ars.
And then youapos;ll see,
Youapos;re gonna go far.
Cause everyone knows,
Who you are-are.
So live your life
Instead of chasing that paper.
Just live your life
You got no time for no haters
Just live your life
No telling where itapos;ll take you.
Just live your life
Cause Iapos;m a paper chaser.
Just living my life.

I have finally finished ENGLISH for the rest of my life. . . . . . THANK GOD

FUCK YOU WIZARD OF OZ, STRICTLY BALLROOM, DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES, TRAVELING LIGHT, AWAY, RAW. AND THE REST

PHYSICAL / IMAGINATIVE / INNER �JOURNEYS CAN SUCK ME OFF


As soon as we drove out of the car park i threw all my english notes out the window and they went everywhere it was real windy as well so they were taken right up in the air by the wind. I had half my body out of the car, with oncoming cars probably going wtf.?? �I cant explain the thrill and mental relief it gave me to see them all just flying away.

All my english notes over the past 2 years probably equated to�100 full grown trees. So i simply gave them back to the environment.

The exam wasnt as bad as i thought it would be, the first question was good, i wrote about 10 pages for the first one.

The 2nd one was shit cause i couldnt remember any of the quotes from the poems i had studied.

The 3rd one was good, but the bitch said pens down just as i got about half way into my 2nd text, and i needed 3 texts, i was soo angry at her, the fuck wit.

I have a few days till my next exam which�is good, cause it gives me time to study and chill a bit.

I feel after all my english lessons, practice exams and real exams�that my vocabulary has been damaged and words just taken out if it and my spelling just fucked up�and my sentence structure just everywhere. Ppffftt like i need it anymore.



4 more to go

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cape newise

Friday: My legs hurt SO bad. I slept almost as soon as I got home from work. I canapos;t remember what else I did.

Saturday: My legs STILL hurt. I went to the Homecoming parade with my parents, grandparents, sister and one of the apos;phews. Lol. (nick was at a camp learning how to cook things in a big pot and it wasnapos;t my sisterapos;s week to have andrew.) I spent the rest of the day reading and making a book for class. Once I was through with homework, I re-read one of my Charlaine Harris books. Then I watched Water Horse with the rents. It was actually... Pretty damn cute.

Sunday: Woke up at 10 and read all of Prince Caspian (for class) by 12. My parents thought I had died because I was quiet and hadnapos;t come downstairs while they were there. (though i had come down and eaten breakfast and gone back up) So they both came to check on me... At different times... Because one was at the store while the other was checking. Lol. The best part is, I was on my laptop on the couch in the living room and even spoke to my mom as she passed me to go upstairs to check on me. She was calling my name up there and I was downstairs giggling because I was obviously NOT there. And now its 4:30 and Iapos;m having trouble deciding if I should continue spending my day doing homework or if I should watch Life and take a break...aka, call it quits for the day. That last one sounds better.

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William Christopher May

the love of my life. When i see him my heat beets none stop. And i cant stop staring at him. Hes a amazing.i love him more then i have ever loved anything in the whole wide world. He the best. He makes me laugh always . And he always knows what to say when im crying.he the best to cuddle with. And hes amazing at kissing. Every day i wonder why hes with me. And not with some on else like he should be. But, idk because i do have him and thatapos;s all that matters to me and i will never loose him ever again. I love you William Christopher may i really do. And i wont fuck up this time i wont. Im going to marry you one day youapos;ll see. Your my almost 18 year old baby and im never giving up on you ever. And i hope you feel the same. I want every thing to be better then ever before. I want you to be happy and show me those dimples. I want you to love me like i love you. I love you baby i really do9/28-foreverwere going to do it right this time i know it.

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I am writing this with full knowledge that I�have a lot to be thankful for.

My sister told me, years ago, about a story in the book Zero Hour ( I�think ) about a protaganist who just wants to find some place to sit down and cry. She wandered all around her house, the town, but there was no place, nowhere at all.

I am feeling a bit like that right now. Almost everyone tells me if I�leave or make any major changes, it must be with knowing what exactly I�want to do. And I donapos;t. I think the trouble could be I have spent my life doing what is expected and suppressing unlawful desires that I canapos;t even sense them anymore.

I canapos;t leave at the end of the year because I will be jobless, the department have few experienced teachers in JC2 and my fatherapos;s retiring and I�need to pay for the house.

I canapos;t change portfolios to HQ because school management blocked it.

I�canapos;t find a new job because I�donapos;t know what I�want, 29 is a bit too old for entry level

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My day has been rather well so far. Bought some new make up and sunglasses since my old sunglasses are... Somewhere I donapos;t know.

Excercised which means I can have a cupcake later and i finished cleaning my bathroom last night.

Iapos;ve also made some really kick ass icons.

I just need to finish cleaning my room and change out spring/summer for fall/winter clothes and Iapos;m all set for my list this weekend.

And today is the wedding reception and this will be awesome I know it will. *excited bounce* How are you all doing?

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So...this last week in a nutshell:

Got a cold, coughed a lot, lost my voice.

Dad fell, went to hospital, got stitches, got tests, has pneumonia, a swallowing problem, needs to not live alone anymore.

Got Acupuncture (Jonathan is the best) for cough, voice loss, and stress.

So...as of now:

Cold mostly gone, cough much better, voice almost back, stress is manageable.

Dad being treated for pneumonia, has a new walker, I have recommendation for an affordable retirement facility.

Jonathan is still the best

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ball hamster

I guess I shouldnapos;t say that for the third day in a row, work was awful. I suppose it wasnapos;t awful. But it wasnapos;t a deliriously happy day either. Add to it, my time of the month snuck up on me too. My morning was filled with meetings, so I didnapos;t get much done at all until the afternoon.

I had to deal with a few troubling things. One, a tasteless and unprofessional picture of our building in a local downtown magazine, basically trashing us because of our parent company. Two, a friend of mine there, the one I visited the other night heard that more layoffs would be happening next month. I used to think I was invincible to things like that, but now Iapos;m not so sure. Iapos;m very, very concerned about my future. Driving home today, I thought Iapos;d better start planning. This condo I live in needs so much updating before I could sell it. I need to do everything I can to make it more presentable. I need to update my resume. I need to make decisions about where I can go, because there certainly is nothing for me here in the salary range Iapos;m now bound to stay in. I know where I -want- to go.

And keeping with that thought, I talked to a girl friend tonight at length on the phone. She lives in another state and has been trying to convince me for a long time to move down there. Itapos;s not a place Iapos;d like to live. But I caught her up on what was happening in my life, and casually mentioned having to move, throwing out the state he lives in just because I like the thought, and frankly, there are two places that I might have a decent chance of finding a job. She jumped all over it, saying we should do it, that she could apply for law school there, that we could live together. Admittedly, I got caught up in her enthusiasm. Of course, I donapos;t want him to feel...weirded out by the whole idea. The last thing I want him to think is that Iapos;d show up without permission, or before I was ready, or for that matter, when he was ready. I would never, ever do that. But I still like to dream about the idea, it makes me feel quite nice inside.

The funny thing is, if I could manage it, I know she could. Sheapos;s one of my few remaining friends unburdened by children, or spouses, and like me, if finances permitted, could pick up and move wherever sheapos;d like. So I donapos;t know. Itapos;s something to think about. I have to have some kind of plan regardless.

I didnapos;t hear much from him tonight. He did have his new computer and was spending his time setting it up, which I know from experience can take some time. I thought of something terrible though. With mine and his computerapos;s broken, does that mean Iapos;ve lost forever every word between us? I really canapos;t bear the thought of that. I hope one or both of us can salvage that at the very least from our old systems.

But before I start rambling again, Iapos;ll stop here. Itapos;s a bit early, so I wonapos;t go to bed just yet. But Iapos;m not sure either that Iapos;ll see or hear from him again tonight. If I donapos;t, I hope that his computer setup went smoothly. I wish him sweet dreams, a quick day of work, and fun with the game that heapos;s now running tomorrow night. Perhaps Iapos;ll see him soon.

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christian nice guy

I did a friends cut.
I noticed a few people who have asked to be added..didnt even add me to their FL..excuse me? ugh..
so..they are gone.

However...I also deleted people who barely have commented or i have even commented on their lj..WE dont have much in common or just dont click.

that is all.. Im not one of those comment to stay kinda people. I find that silly. But if someone wants to stay they can comment and ill add them back.


comments screened/ post public for a week.
If you notice youapos;ve been cut and youapos;d like to be added back by me.
Let me know im happy to add anyone who WANTS to stay. However friends are a two way street. If i add you..you gota add me back. :)

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